2016 Election Politics -- causing conflict?

[Mary B.]

On the Cohousing-L discussion board, there was a conversation going for a brief while about accepting diversity vs. drawing boundaries when ideas (like racism, xenophobia) are considered "wrong". The discussion was shut down by the list's manager, but readers are welcome to continue exploring the idea here. The assumption is that members will refrain from criticizing or inadvertently insulting other members of the board.

So, how has the 2016 US Election affected your views about what you accept in terms of diverse opinions?

[garyronstadt]

I'm afraid this election may have created some deep rifts in our community. Most of our neighbors are very liberal or independents (like my wife and I) but a few are avid Trump supporters ... not because they're racist or misogynistic in any way, but because they just hate Hillary Clinton with what seems to me to be a rabid distrust and hatred that borders on hysteria.

The weird thing is, you'd expect that being in the minority, they would just keep their opinions kind of quiet and vote their heart, but no. Even after the election, they can't help crowing and taking opportunities to gloat and otherwise affront the other members of our community. And although they claim they only voted for Trump because Hillary was so toxic for them, they get REALLY tetchy about ANY criticism of him. I think they're personalizing it as criticism of their own choice. It is the weirdest thing, I can't figure out the psychology of it at all. And since Trump seems intent on giving Americans plenty to criticize, I don't think they're going to be sitting any easier in the saddle as time goes on. Meanwhile, they seem totally unaware that they're offending people right and left.

[JasminaJ]

Our community (although we're not an official cohousing yet) seems pretty evenly divided, and actually things have been pretty calm here. I think the consensus (using the term loosely) is that both choices were poor, and it's the devil you know or the devil you don't. We've had some energetic exchanges about the electoral process, conflicts of interest, and appointments but it's all been relatively civil. We do have a couple of people I think of as the "condo curmudgeons" who come out for Friday wine night and it's like they come prepped and primed with snide, know-it-all comments but most of us just nod and head for the wine table, problem solved.

[Mary B.]

I'm finding it difficult here to work up the excitement I usually have for social events and dinners, due to two people who always bring up recent developments. I try to ignore it (classic conflict avoidance) but that just allows these two to dominate the conversation. Plus, they seem to think others who remain silent agree or are willing to be endlessly lectured. But if I speak up, I get hammered for 'proof' and since I don't carry my phone everywhere and my memory for detail sucks, I'm left standing on one foot. It's so unpleasant I'm considering just avoiding events until things die down ... and inevitably hurting feelings. Feeling kind of stuck in an uncomfortable place.